POLITICS - Uncle Bossi's Political Rundown

From however much attention I was paying to the debates:

Plugging his/her website:
Hillary - 2
Obama - 0

Mispronouncing "Lancaster":
Hillary - 1
Obama - 0

Way to be in touch.

When I'm running for President, I'm going to make my campaign website something like boomshakalaka.com (if only it weren't already taken by some skeezy/cheesy-looking audio website).

THOUGHT - Made In (the Republic of) China

I think it would be a lot of fun to go to some store around here -- say, a Wal*Mart -- and take a bunch of "Made In Taiwan" stickers off the merchandise. Then go to the Olympics in China, visit some of the shops there, and put those stickers on everything.

THOUGHT - Don't Squeeze My Goomba

I had a very philosophical rant today about Mario. Now think about it, here you have this man -- a plumber by trade -- running around to save a princess. Firstly, why is the princess in such dire straits? What exactly was she doing to get herself kidnapped in the first place? Where were her ever-vigilant 4-foot tall guards with their 3-foot tall mushroom hats? Dagnabit, ma'am, hire yourself a Swiss legion; and when you're playing football: wear some clothes and don't come off as such a ditz. All you do is bake cakes, pick peaches, and get yourself kidnapped.

I find myself wondering: is Bowser after her money; her power; or is Bowser just a pervert after some cross-species lovins? Or maybe Bowser has a thing for Victorian-esque dresses and is just seeking some fashion advice the only way he knows how: kidnapping people. Maybe, growing up, all Bowser ever learned from his parents was that force was the answer: so he's never known any other way. I bet if you exhaled fire with every breath, people might stay kind of far away from you -- that sort of isolation can be pretty rough on a little kid. Just because he likes the color pink and comes off as a bit of a bully, Mario has to go and be a hot-shot.

By "hot-shot" I mean this: he runs around and jumps on cute little critter's heads, squashing them down to a pancake. I mean, would you seriously go out and, say, jump on an innocent little bunny? Goombas really aren't so different from a bunny: all they ever do is amble about; and there are hundreds of them all over the place. And "goomba" is an Italian term for a very close friend, so really what Mario is doing is squishing cute little guys that just want to be his buddy. Then there's Koopas, wandering about with babbling mouths resembling little fishies... well... OK maybe resembling little turtles. Every Marylander should take dear offense every time a precious terrapin is lost beneath that pair of Italian shoes.

I'm really irked whenever Mario comes up to a flying critter. In these situations, Mario must either land on top of the hapless animal and jump off its head to reach the ledge on the far side; or Mario will fall to his doom. Clearly, option #2 is not a preferable choice for our "hero", so he runs off and leaps on top of a jovial beast whose only crime is enjoying the breeze beneath its wings. In its last for moments of life before an overweight plumber quashes his aviator spirits and sends him falling to his doom, I'm sure that critter wishes he knew what made it so bloody important that Mario had to get across that cliff.

What I want to know is just that: why does Mario HAVE to get across that ledge, anyway? Didn't Mario ever learn that he shouldn't go jumping off of cliffs? Or that cliffs are dangerous? I mean, he might miss the critter and then Mario would himself meet his demise. I bet Mario's mother would be disheartened to learn that her son ran off the edge like a lemming, and she would surely blame herself for never teaching him any better. "If only he joined the mafia like every other young boy, he wouldn't have gotten into this mess," she'd say.

Whenever I am playing Mario and come to a point where I have to sacrifice a koopa or a goomba to the great abyss just so I don't have to fall into the void myself, I always turn around and go back the other way. It's just not worth it, man... it's just not worth it.

DREAM - Weird dream...

I had a weird dream last night... it has been a long time since I've had a dream this vivid, which is rather odd because these kinds of dreams always seem to have a lot of things that actually happen in real life. I'm not sure if that's just causality, though: I think it so I make it happen -- sort of like how you don't notice some type of car until you get one, and suddenly it seems like they're everywhere. In this sense, I dream about things that I subconsciously know will happen anyway -- so when they occur I think "hey wow I dreampt about that".

My grandparent's house.

Basically, it took place in a house which I somehow knew to be in New York. It was an old house -- about 100 years old -- which was similar in design to the East Falls neighborhood in Philly, out near Penn Charter. Fitting, as the first two floors were nearly identical to the first two floors of my grandparent's house in East Falls (as shown in the attached image). The kitchen and hallway were the same and the staircase was there, though I can't recall much of the living room or porch or too many specifics of the 2nd floor.

It was a dark night and windy, but otherwise dry out with a relatively clear sky. For some reason there was a war on and I was dressed in military fatigues. The house was host to my platoon of about 25 people -- as far as we were aware, the home's owners were not around, so we occupied the house as a base. The commanding officer was reviewing documents in the kitchen and asked me to go upstairs to track down another officer whom was needed. I don't remember much of the CO, but I somehow knew what the officer I was supposed to track down looked like -- he was a fellow CE from Penn State whom specialised in hydrology.

Going up the staircase -- again almost identical to my Grandparent's, I was heading up to the third floor when I called out the soldier's name. I didn't hear a response, but I somehow knew that he would be in the bedroom at the far-left end of the hall. I kept going up the stairs, wrapped around the banister, and here the 3rd floor was a bit different from my grandparent's house.

There were two doors on the right and a bathroom straight ahead -- the same as our house in Philly, but the left side was altered a bit. Here, there was a small nook just above the stairs which went to a door to the outside; and the bedroom was now down an elongated hall. The door to the outside had an odd look: not your typical house sort of door, but more like some mechanical contraption, albeit with a small window right at head-height. Outside was a small ledge, with an even smaller ledge leading along the right side (alongside the bedroom).

The real 3rd floor of my grandparent's house on the left; my dream's layout on the right.

In the floorplan image I have here, the left is the 3rd floor of my grandparent's house; the right is the layout in my dream. The two doors at right lead off to other rooms, the door at the top is the bathroom, and the door at mid-left (in the dream) is the door to the outside ledge.

I went to the bedroom and walked in on the soldier and a woman both sound asleep in bed. Yes, sleeping -- this isn't that kind of dream. I make some wise crack to wake them up, at which point the soldier leaps up -- dressed in boxers & an undershirt (I'm glad, too: I wouldn't know what to think of myself if I had a dream where a male was wearing anything less).

The woman, wearing nil, ran off like lightening into a closet or bathroom or something on the other side of the room. I can only assume it was a bathroom, as I know it had a window... not many closets have windows. Somehow in that fleeting second of blazing nudity, I recognised the woman as the "Baroness". Not sure why I called her that... and I'm also not sure how exactly I knew that her family was the true owner of the house which we were occupying.

The soldier was throwing on his fatigues and I made some joke about how he shouldn't bother to stop what he was doing, as by the time he got to see the CO, the CO would probably forget why he wanted the soldier in the first place. I forget how exactly I phrased it, but we both had a good laugh... it must have been funnier than how I typed it above, or maybe it was just the nature of the embarrassing moment which made any outlet of humor seem funnier. My duty done, I turned around and walked back down the hall, where I am confronted by the Baroness right by the stair -- near the door to the outside. Apparently when she ran into the side room, she hopped out a window, went along a ledge, and came back in through the door to the outside.

Now fully dressed, she apologised for meeting me in such a manner and formally introduced herself. She was in her mid-20's, fair skinned, dark brown hair, and had wavy hair that made me think of the style from around the 1940's. She wore a black dress with a white sash, with a gray wool overcoat -- also all in a 1940's fashion. I might best compare her to a young Jennifer Garner, but a bit different. At this point the soldier, dressed, showed up behind me and briefly got between me and the Baroness before (as if protecting his interest), but a second later stepped back to free up some space and let me chat to the Baroness.

There was a bit of idle chatter which I can't quite recall, but it was just a couple lines lasting maybe 30 seconds. I then pointed at the door to the outside and asked if it was a retractable bridge. How did I know it was that? Don't know. Why would I suddenly ask that, of all things? Not sure... but somehow I thought I knew what it was and curiosity got the best of me.

The Baroness was surprised that I would have known what it was, saying how no one knew what it was outside of her family. I said that I had seen the house in a photo once and that our families used to be friends a long time ago, so I remembered once learning about the bridge. I have no idea where this info all came from... I certainly can't recall such a photo or learning of such a bridge.

Excited, she opened a panel beside the door (it looked like a fuse box), flipped a switch, opened the door, and walked out onto a narrow bridge which was now emerging from the house -- apparently hidden within the floor directly beneath us. It extended out about 30 feet before the wind really started pushing it back and forth. The Baroness became worried and I yelled for her to bring the bridge back in before it got damaged, to which she complied and retracted the bridge.

This is what the river looked like.

The three of us stared across the way -- the yard below gave way to a wood fence (again: just like my grandparent's yard). Beyond the yard was a small, narrow street with crumbling pavement -- I assume it was crumbling because of whatever war it was that was occurring. Just beyond the street was the bank leading down to a river. The riverbanks were just like the Salzach in Salzburg -- moderately-steep slopes covered with bare grass.

On the other bank was the first floor of what used to be a building. It was in ruins, with many of the walls still generally standing, but they were several gaping holes in the walls and one wall facing us was indeed gone entirely. Much of the rear walls (actually the front of the house, facing away from us) were also gone. The ceiling was completely caved in -- nothing at all was left of it. The house was generally blue-ish in color and much of it appeared to be relatively recent construction.

Through all the holes I could see waifs running all over the place in the ruined house on the other side of the river. They all ran off about a minute later, chasing some critter that ran outside and away from the building. Somehow I knew that this side of the river was the defacto "no man's land" between my side's army and whomever we were fighting. The only people left were the children whom lacked both supervision and an understanding of what exactly was happening.

After staring at the ruins a bit, I came to realise that the ruined modern building had actually been constructed on the foundation of an older building which had apparently been demolished. This original building's foundation led me to think that it was likely of a similar design as the house that I was in. Then I followed the thought process and realised that the retractable bridge used to connect with a receiving building on the other side of the river.

Somehow the three of us knew this to be important... but just as I was starting to make the connections as to how exactly it was so important to me, my bloody alarm clock woke me up: it was 7:50 and time to go to work. However, in that first split-second where you cross from being nearly unconscious to being awake, a thought flashed through my head: I have to go to New York.

This thought wasn't a "I have to go right NOW" sort of thought, but just that I need to get myself there within the next couple years. Now the trick is that I have no idea where in New York. It kind of felt like I was in Upstate or Western New York, but I have no connections there so that just doesn't seem right. I do have connections on Long Island... but since I've never been there, I don't know what it looks like to be sure. So I guess now I need to explore and chase down my dream... might sound weird, but I've done it before and have found places I've never been to, but have dreampt about. Causality, perhaps?

THOUGHT - Canonlove

Because this is long, nobody will read it. Therefore the moral of the story: I am now a dedicated fan of Canon. Maybe if I'm in the mood for the best cameras out there, I'll go Nikon... but Canon's customer service is definitely top-notch. Now the story that no one will ever read:

I used to have a Canon Powershot A95, which I put through considerable abuse (my camera frequently tasted the surface of concrete) and found myself periodically sending it away for warranty repairs. With one exception, of the three or four times I sent it in over a 2-year period: Canon repaired it for no charge. There was one occasion where it was pretty blatant that I dropped it... that one I had to pay for, but it was pretty reasonable. Each repair, the camera would get returned to me within a week or two; and I got continuous emails each time there was a status change.

For that reason, I went up to a Powershot A640 when I decided it was time for an upgrade. I've made sure to use the wrist strap -- for which I should probably thank Nintendo for training me to use those things with the Wii. It still took a lot... it's been dropped in glaciers, faced into waterfalls, sat in the sun in 100+ weather only to switch about 30 minutes later into a place with a wind chill of -40. It wasn't a surprise (especially thanks to the waterfall) that I'd have some problems... and sure enough I did.

One week without a camera and a warranty repair later, problem solved. The camera was fine right up through to December when I somehow got an eyelash on the lens... well more specifically, behind the glass but on the lens: so I couldn't get to it without dismantling the camera and voiding the warranty. In for repair, a week & a half later I have it back... but each image was blurry, the tones aren't balanced, and I have lots of visual noise. Send it back, they replace the optical unit, I get it back a week & a half later. Now it doesn't auto-focus: I just can't lock on to anything.

Now it's the end of January and my camera has been in for nonstop repairs for a month: I'm a bit annoyed with Canon. In my letter describing the technical problem, I mention how it might be more cost-effective if Canon just replaced the whole unit.

...I get a package today, a week & a half after sending it in, and to my surprise: not only did they replace it, but I got an upgrade to the new version which was released at the end of last year. Sweet. Canon not only saved a customer, but they've convinced me that I'm definitely with the right brand.

So that's my spam, and spamarific it is. Also, from events of today, I'd like to further thank the following products: G.I. Joe, Tums, the New Yorker, and Uncle Ben's Leather Shop.

POLITICS - Post your questions for the Presidential debates

Submit your questions here and vote for those which others have submitted:
http://dyn.politico.com/debate/

I will follow with the questions I have already posed...



Our road, rail, sea, and air transport systems are at and over capacity. How do you plan to address the looming transportation funding crises in the short-term (noting the pending expiration of SAFETEA-LU), and what long-term strategies do you propose to reduce our demand or increase our supply of transportation capabilities?



Our present development patterns tend to involve signifant suburban growth at the cost of rural and urban regions. One side calls this the will of the free market, stating that such growth is beneficial in that it utilizes a surplus of land area to provide goods and services at reduced cost. Another side deems this unsustainable "sprawl" and argues that such development increases the cost of goods and services due to the increased demand on infrastructure. What side do you believe is more akin to your own viewpoint, and how would you intend to further your cause; or, alternatively, to reconcile the two arguments?




To receive federal funding, transportation projects are generally required to examine potential ridership based on existing data which is grown to the build-out year. Now consider a transportation line which is proposed to travel through a blighted urban area where population density is presently low, but redevelopment potential is high. This potential for redevelopment cannot be easily considered in ridership estimates, which can limit the project's viability and hence leave the area blighted.

In a similar sense, what if a transit line is planned to extend into a presently undeveloped region. Developers and the transit agency are willing to coordinate development around this new line -- a modern "streetcar suburb". This could target growth onto a more sustainable system, but ridership estimates for federal funding would likely result in a declined application.

On the one hand, such refusal to accept coordination between transportation and land use may run counter to a sustainable culture: forcing us to build new lines with limited development options. On the other hand, Alaska's recent attempt to build the Gravina Island Bridge to provide access to developable land raised significant concerns about pork spending. Do you believe greater emphasis is necessary on transportation and land use coordination? If not, why not? If so, how do you propose to improve such coordination whilst ensuring that federal funds are not over-dispersed (draining available funds) or given to projects with a limited potential to succeed?




Our current transportation investments result in skewed travel relationships. I can fly from Baltimore-Washington to Boston for less than it costs me to ride AMTRAK -- a transportation with a reduced environmental footprint and a mode which is not particularly likely to be directly involved in an event on par with 9/11. It cost me twice as much to travel on a mode that takes twice the time. Our subsidies toward roadways -- particularly parking -- has similarly resulted in a mode of transportation which, while convenient in that it provides direct point-to-point travel -- is extremely demanding on the environment and our energy needs. Clearly, I do not believe the status quo is adequate. Do you concur, and if so: how would you propose to adjust the public financing of various transportation modes? If you disagree with my viewpoint, how would you propose to maintain AMTRAK's competitiveness versus alternate modes such as road and air?



This question relates to the amount of transportation modes available to commuters -- disregarding freight. Do you believe it best to provide a single mode of transportation or a multimodal system? Consider that a single mode could provide for increased funding targeted toward capacity and operation improvements, and a multimodal system would involve distributed funding -- where each mode is not as capable as it could be if it were the sole mode; but the commuter has options available to choose from. The single mode system is, in general, similar to our present state: dependent upon the personal automobile. If you choose a single mode system, what mode of transportation would you choose to emphasize?

THOUGHT - A vote for Dodd is a vote for Capt. Murphy!

Is it just me, or does presidential candidate Chris Dodd look like Captain Murphy from Sealab 2021?

 

...get that man a jumpsuit